


Bright Enough to Rival Stars

by bluehawthorn



Series: Axis [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi (2017), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Ending, Angst, Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, Except it still kind of does, F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Hurt/Comfort, Inappropriate Use of the Force, Kylo Ren Makes Tea, Oral Sex, POV Rey, Porn with Feelings, Porn with a little bit of Plot, Post Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Redemption stories are the best stories, Reylo - Freeform, Smut, The Last Jedi - Freeform, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, all the feels, romantic smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-09
Updated: 2018-01-09
Packaged: 2019-03-01 13:47:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13296159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluehawthorn/pseuds/bluehawthorn
Summary: What if Rey didn't say no...or yes. What if she simply asked for more time?





	Bright Enough to Rival Stars

**Author's Note:**

> TLJ sent me careening quite suddenly into this fandom (and this ship in particular). Until now I've been a rather casual fan, so I apologize for any errors in canon. Also, my smut writing skills are a bit rusty. Bear with me.
> 
> Added later: Keep an eye out as this may become a series after all!

He is holding his hand out to her, his eyes glistening, black hair tousled around his pale, scarred face. Bodies lie scattered around them. Everything is red.

There is desperation in his voice. "Please."

She is holding her breath. _No, it cannot end like this. He is so close to turning. We cannot lose him after all this. ___

____

____

But she obviously cannot join him. 

She is unsure what to do. She needs time. 

"Don't do this Ben. Please don't go this way. Just...stop. Can we just....can you take me somewhere? I just....need a moment." She scrubs a hand over her face. 

Something like hurt crosses his face, but he slowly pulls back his hand. After a moment's pause he nods his head. 

"Come with me."

He keys something into a data station beside the doors and they slide open, so thick that she understands now why the guards did not hear the fighting through them. Of course Snoke's throne room would be sound proof. It likely isn't monitored either.

In that low dangerous voice, he is all Kylo Ren when he commands the guards, "Supreme Leader Snoke does not wish to be disturbed." She can sense when he also reaches out with the Force to manipulate their minds.

"That should give us a few hours at least," he says.

She nods. The adrenaline is leaving her and fatigue is creeping through her limbs. _When is the last time I slept? _At one point she stumbles as they walk, and he reaches out, one of his large hands curling around her elbow, steadying her.__

____

____

"Thanks," she says. He doesn't respond. The heat of his touch lingers for a long time after.

They travel down hallway after hallway. She realizes he must be using the Force again. They pass no one as they walk. He must be feeling for empty corridors, taking them in a circuitous route so that no one will see the evidence of battle all over them.

She glances up at him a few times. His brooding features look vaguely troubled but don't reveal anything more than that. She doesn't reach for his mind.

Eventually he stops in front of a set of doors. She bumps into him, taking a step back and looking up at his face. _Why must he be so impossibly tall? _She feels small beside him and it reminds her of when he was a thing of nightmares for her. It wasn't so long ago.__

____

____

"My quarters." He hesitates for a moment as though considering whether he should bring her inside, but then he opens the doors with a keypad.

They slide open and she enters ahead of him, taking it all in, curiosity giving her a new wave of energy. She's wondered before what kind of space contains this man in his private moments.

It is surprisingly...comfortable. Spacious enough to encompass several small rooms, but not as big as she expected, considering his station here.

The first chamber seems to be a sitting room. Mostly black and chrome of course and relatively sparse, but there is a hologram that fills one of the walls with an ancient looking forest, breathcatchingly green and bathed in light that filters golden through the trees. Its glow lights the room pleasantly. She gestures toward it, letting her surprise show on her face.

He shrugs. "I appreciate beauty." His eyes linger on her for a moment and she feels herself flushing. She is relieved when he looks away. 

"The refresher is there." He points toward the back of the room where there are two doors further along the left hand wall. "The first one."

She tries not to think about what lies in the second room. His bedchambers no doubt.

She murmurs a grateful noise and walks the few steps across the room to duck inside. The light turns on automatically when she opens the door. It's small, but also luxurious compared to what she's used to. 

She closes the door, relieves herself and then looks at her reflection in the mirror. She is disheveled, her eyes too bright, a bruise forming over one of them. Her cheeks are pink from exertion. _What am I doing here? ___

____

____

She realizes she's above a sink and so she fumbles with the controls and there, amazingly, is water. Hot water. She runs her hands beneath it, savouring the way it eases the soreness in them. She must have had a death grip on her lightsaber for them to hurt so much. 

Revelling in its abundance, she cups the water between her hands, splashes it on her face, her neck, washing off the sweat and blood. She sighs, looking at herself again for a moment before squaring her shoulders and stepping back into the sitting room. 

Kylo - or is it Ben? - is in the next room, which is now lit up, revealing a small kitchen and dining area. She smiles despite herself.

"You have a kitchen?" she hears herself splutter. "Do you...make food?"

He looms in the doorway. "Well, no. There is a droid that does it. But I like to take my meals here most of the time. I value my privacy." 

A few moments pass with them looking at each other. It's discomfiting in a way - there is a subtle hunger in the way he looks at her that she doesn't want to examine too closely. But it's comforting too, being physically near him. The silence between them is nearly companionable. They have, after all, become quite familiar with one another. 

She is filled with sudden hatred for the idea that Snoke created the bond that bridges them. It sullies something that feels important. Sacred even.

He seems to see her face change and in response gathers his thoughts. She tries to do the same, pretend some sense of normalcy.

"Do you want...tea?" he asks, almost shyly. This is not something she would have thought him capable of before, but here it is.

"Tea?" she asks incredulously.

"Yes, tea," he says back defensively. "Plants steeped in water." He tries to sound sarcastic but he is definitely more unsure of himself than she's ever seen him. 

"I drink it to help my training or to heal faster, but there are a few that are passably good." He looks slightly mortified. "You know, in terms of taste."

She hesitates for a moment, and then the full absurdity of the moment washes over her and she can't help but giggle. She feels a bit delirious.

"Kylo Ren is offering me tea." She laughs until her stomach feels pulled too tight. It feels good though; a release of some of the weight she's been carrying.

When she wipes the tears away from her eyes she sees that he still looks flustered and then, gazing at her as her laughter fades, his face breaks. It's slow, but soon he is smiling - laughing even in a low chuckle - and it stills her because he's beautiful. 

She doesn't stop the realization of it from showing on her face, let's him see it. "You should do that more often", she says.

He stops, grows serious again. The moment draws out and then he clears his voice. "So, uh, tea?" he asks, still sounding mildly embarrassed.

To rescue him from it she says, "Yes, Ben, I'd like tea."

At hearing his old name again he winces slightly. He turns away quickly, and opens a sleek black cupboard, peering into it. "What kind?"

She waves a hand in the air. "It doesn't matter. I trust you."

At that he leans out again, one eyebrow raising. Despite herself she laughs again. "Just with this. Don't let it go to your head."

His mouth quirks up at the corner again and it suits him. She wonders how long it's been, since he allowed himself to smile or laugh. Since he had anything to provoke it. 

He busies himself making their tea, and she looks around the room. There is a black leather armchair nearby. He must sense her moving towards it, as he pauses in his tea making for a moment to encourage her, "Sit. Please."

She does. The chair is remarkably comfortable. She pulls her legs up and folds them underneath her. It's big, made for him she supposes, and she feels cozy and contained in it. 

It faces the hologram, which is so real, so vibrant, that she almost feels that she can smell the moss covered trees. Or maybe she is smelling the scent of him, permeating the room...she stops the thought and instead goes back to absorbing her surroundings.

Next to the chair is a dark coloured table scattered with scrolls and one large bound book. Against a wall nearby is a shelf with more of the same.

Again she finds herself surprised. "And you read?"

His voice is tinged with humour in response. She didn't think she could like his voice anymore than she already did - the sound of it vibrating something in her each time he speaks - but like this, she could listen to it endlessly. "Of course I do. Don't you?"

"Yes, well, when I can get my hands on things to read. I just didn't think..." She trails off. She didn't expect a lot of things that have happened on this extraordinary day.

"If I didn't continue my studies I wouldn't exactly be useful to..."

Snoke. She doesn't feel badly, but she does take a moment to consider that he just killed his Master, at least in part for her...someone who was likely a father figure in his life.

Which makes her think about his actual father. Her friend. Her friend whom he murdered. She pulls into herself, the loss opening again like a wound, remembering. A few minutes pass.

He brings her tea and hands the mug to her - black porcelain of course at which she rolls her eyes a bit because really, how seriously do these people take themselves - and then strides back into the kitchen. When he returns he has his own tea and a chair he must use for dining. He drags it in front of her and sits down, framed by the forest behind him.

His gloves are gone for once and he has obviously cleaned up as well. For some reason the idea of him washing himself in the kitchen sink pulls at something in her. It wars with her anger and grief.

They sit for a while, holding their tea, both caught in the turmoil of their own thoughts. He stares down at the cup in his hand as if studying it and she stares at him, trying to reconcile the killer Kylo Ren with these other parts of him she is coming to know.

After it cools, she takes a sip of the tea and it is earthy and lovely and so she drinks deeper. He watches her and then leans forward to put his own mug aside on the table, gently prodding a scroll out of the way. His momentary nearness makes her heart accelerate in a way she has very mixed feelings about.

Eventually, he speaks first. "What I asked...before..."

She interrupts him, not wanting to hear what she fears he will say. "I know. Why you asked. I feel it too." She smiles wryly, remembering him saying the same thing to her under very different circumstances. How quickly things have changed. 

"But you know that I can't join you here. As part of the First Order. I can't join you at all after what you've done."

Disappointment and frustration shadows his features, but he masters himself and nods.

"That doesn't mean we can't...well, I don't know. All I know is that I don't want to go back to being enemies. I don't want to fight you."

He nods again, in agreement.

"Before I can decide anything, I need you to tell me. How this happened to you. I need to understand."

He stares at her. Intensely. As if measuring whether it is safe to answer. His eyes are clear and depthless. She could get lost in them, she thinks. _But I shouldn't. Definitely shouldn't do that. ___

____

____

She stares back, chin raised. In time his shoulders sag forward and the expression on his face reminds her of a cornered animal resigned to its fate. 

The moments stretch out and she thinks that perhaps she's asked too much of him, too fast. But then, he begins to speak.

"I was never...like them."

Immediately, Rey knows who he is talking about. His parents. His uncle. The heroes of the Resistance.

"I didn't even look like them, not really. I certainly didn't think or feel like them. Then I started awakening to the Force and felt my power begin to grow. Soon after, I learned who my mother's father was - just as I was beginning to feel the pull to the Dark Side more strongly. I thought it must be because I was like...him. And by that time Snoke was in my mind, telling me that I was the heir to Vader's legacy. I...believed him."

She can imagine him as a young man, confused and pulled between all of these incredibly powerful influences, all the while being manipulated by Snoke. He hadn't stood a chance.

His head bows slightly as though he can't bring himself to look at her, but through the bond she can feel an opening in the defenses around his mind, can sense it is on purpose, as though he were allowing her a window to peer through. She reaches toward it and images flooded her:

....a young Ben watching his father be effortlessly charming with others but turning away from his own son when he was hurting, telling him to be tougher, not to cry...

...bloody and scuffling with two other boys who couldn't best him physically but wounded him regardless with their taunts and jeers about his family...

...watching his mother, stately and distant, mounting a gangplank, leaving again...

She sees him as he grows older amidst the bright bustle of life with his famous parents - the smuggler and the Senator - but alone. She can feel his sadness, his anger, his sense of being set apart. 

And she can feel Snoke. Like a poison in his mind, whispering to him, stoking his darkness.

Then there was an older Ben facing his uncle, Luke, a desperate rage on his face. She could feel it: the way he'd never known who he was, knew he probably never could know while living in the shadows of legends. How he'd felt lied to, not being told who his grandfather was, learning from one of his fellow padawans after it had been made public. 

How he was done with it, ready to tear Luke's temple down around him. And still there was Snoke's voice in his head goading him on, promising him everything he longed for.

And so he did tear it down when he thought Luke had betrayed him...had tried to kill him he had thought. He summoned more and more of his power until he shone with it, glorious and deadly. She saw him turning his fellow padawans to his cause, slaughtering the others, burning the temple, shredding Luke's hope. She felt his guilt but also his elation at being free. 

Or so he thought. 

She next sees him on a First Order Ship, no longer a boy but still alone, still lost. She sees him kneeling in front of the sinister, melted mask of Darth Vader, as if in prayer. 

She pulls away. It is too much. She doesn't know how to hold the compassion she feels for him against the horror of all he's done. It wasn't entirely his fault, not really - he'd only been a lonely boy taken advantage of by someone much older and more powerful - and yet it also wasn't _not _his fault either.__

____

____

There is a long moment, Ben sitting painfully still while Rey tries to digest what she's seen. After a while he continues, although he seems reluctant to. 

"I was wrong. I couldn't live up to them either - Snoke, my grandfather. Despite everything, my allegiance to the Dark Side was never easy. I thought that if I did what was asked of me, if I passed a final test, that I would finally belong...on the path I'd chosen."

She knew this part. She was there. She'd heard what he'd said before killing his father: that he was being torn apart. When he thrust his lightsaber through Han Solo's chest, he had thought it would extinguish the Light in him for good. 

She remembered Han's hand lifting to cup his son's face before he fell. Her heart squeezes painfully and she feels the sting of tears.

Her voice when she speaks is quiet and strained. "It didn't work." It is partway between a question and a statement. She needs to hear him say it.

There is a long pause. He still isn't looking at her. 

When he finally says it, she'd begun to think he wasn't going to answer. "No. It didn't."

He runs a hand through his hair, the movement jagged. His voice sounds bitter, edged with self-hatred. "But it doesn't matter. I made my choice. Whether or not it is easy or right, it is made. There is no going back." 

He stands, pacing. In the small room his energy is so big it's almost suffocating. She pulls back deeper into the chair, away from the thrum of his restless despair. He is wild, frantic with the conflict that has burned in and through him for so long.

"But then, with you sometimes...I feel...something." He stops, turning to face her as though he is suddenly seeing clearly. "Relief. Almost...whole."

She looks up at him and takes a long, shaking breath. He doesn't wait for her to respond. It is like he can't, the emotion in him too strong.

"It's folly! I know it is. This thing I feel when I'm with you." He spits it at her, a small but potent violence. 

It breaks something open in her. She feels herself rising off the chair, consumed with rage, summoning every ounce of presence she can muster. She feels the Force gathering within her. Angry like this, she thinks that despite his superior training, she could destroy him. Perhaps she should. She feels a flicker of satisfaction in a secret dark place when he flinches back from her.

"What _you _feel is folly?" she shouts at him. "What about me, here, in this place with you? Do you realize what I risked coming here? Because I believed, like your father did, that there might be some Light left in you?"__

____

____

"You're a murderer. You tried to kill me, you nearly killed Finn. I watched you kill Han!" Her voice drops lower. "I watched you kill your own father. My friend."

She spits it back at him, "And yet here I am Ben. I'm right here."

He drops his head. She steps toward him and although he towers over her, commands him, "Look at me." He does.

"I can't forgive you. That's not my place. I don't know what it would take for you to make up for what you've done. But I also feel _you _. I know you're still in there. I know..."__

____

____

There aren't words for this, this thing they share. And so instead of finishing she reaches for his hand. 

He lets her take it. It is warm and dry and easily engulfs her own. 

She leads him back to the armchair, sweeping the other chair aside with the Force to make room. She takes a moment to wonder at how much easier it is becoming to control her abilities and then she reaches up and with her hands on his shoulders, pushes him back into the armchair. He doesn't resist her, simply sitting back and searching her face with an expression so vulnerable it sears right through her.

She reaches to brush the hair back from his face and there is another long moment of them gazing at each other. And then, she shocks them both by climbing slowly into his lap, straddling him. Her hands rest on his chest, over his heart, which she can feel thundering beneath his ribs.

His eyes go wide, reflecting the light of the hologram. "Rey, you don't have to..."

"Shhh." She shushes him and opens a window into her own mind, just as he did for her. She looks into the unfathomable deep of those dark eyes and yes, there is Light there, as sure as sunrise. 

And so, she takes a deep breath and lets him in just as he did for her. She allows him to see the fullness of what she feels for him:

....the anger at him, but also for him, that he should have had to suffer in the ways he has....

...her horror at what he's done but also her belief that he can still choose the Light, that it's still not too late for him...

...her hope, her fear, her understanding, her own shared loneliness and longing...

...and even, lastly, her desire....

She feels the moment he senses it, the undercurrent beneath everything else. Her shame over it too, her wariness, she doesn't hide those, but also the growing sense of rightness of it. He is, after all, her equal...her balance, the Dark to her Light.

She knows that now, as surely as she's known anything. She also knows with sudden certainty that Snoke did not create this bond. He only used it to his own ends. And underestimating it - underestimating _them _\- truly was his downfall.__

____

____

Kylo's - Ben's - chest is heaving. She nods, as if to let him know yes, it's all true.

He searches her face again and what he finds there snaps something free in him. So quickly she barely has time to register it happening, his arms go around her. One wraps around her lower back, pulling her roughly against him. She gasps when she feels his hardness press into her.

The other is on the nape of her neck. He uses it to pull her down into a kiss. Their mouths meet and the softness and warmth of his lips obliterates everything else. 

Any doubt she was feeling is razed from her by the taste of him. It is like her first glimpse of a green world after the endless sand of Jakku, quenching something in her while at the same time awakening a thirst that is sharp and consuming. She wants more.

His tongue prods at her lips and she parts them, reaching out with her own and he groans as they touch. The sound liquefies her, fills her with a heavy pooling heat she's never felt before. She is breathing his breath and her hands are in his hair. 

The press of his body is demanding, but also gentle. His hands roam over her spine, her bare shoulders, her ribcage. She pulls away from his kisses to look at him and he sits back, trailing his fingertips over her neck and then raising them to trace across her lips. She nips at one of them, holding it for a moment between her teeth, flicking out her tongue against it.

His mouth parts and his eyes are hazy with want. She releases him and his hands fall to her thighs, rubbing up before settling on her hips. Every place he touches sparks alight. They kiss again and it is messier this time, escalating in intensity, laced with need.

He lifts her, effortlessly, rising from the chair, his hands on her backside, fingers pressed into her flesh. Her legs wrap around his waist and her arms around his neck. He keeps kissing her, again and again until her head swims, as he carries her across the room. He pushes a button and a door hisses open behind them.

The room is a soft kind of dark, intimate and warm. He lowers her onto his bed. His weight settles onto her, pushing her into the mattress. Her limbs are still around him and he is everywhere around her. It's intoxicating.

He buries his face in her neck, drawing in a shuddering breath. "Rey," he intones. Her name sounds holy in that voice of his, husky now with desire. It makes her shiver and arch into him. "Rey."

"Open to me," he pleads. She feels him stroking against something in her mind, and understands what he wants. She begins to lift her defenses and let him in. She finds, gratefully, she is able to keep some doors locked while opening all the others. 

He does the same for her. Their minds crash into each other and it is a tumbling overwhelm of sensations that leaves her breathless. His thoughts and emotions wash over her. _This man, he feels so much._

____

____

He holds her tight, both of them breathing heavily. He gains control first, his consciousness twining around hers until their minds are tangled together just like their bodies on the bed. It grows easier to be with as she breathes with it, having him inside her this way, but it stretches her. It feels as though she has to grow bigger to encompass it all, and it would be painful if it didn't also feel so good.

He lifts himself onto his arms above her and she can see herself through his eyes. To him, she is as radiant and lovely as moonlight.

He moves over and lays along her side. "Can I?" he murmurs, his fingers teasing along the edge of her waistband. "Yes," She breathes.

He slips his hand down, his long deft fingers sliding against her, into the wetness growing between her thighs. He slips them inside her and she calls out, muffling the sound against his collarbones.

He begins to fuck her slowly on his fingers, kissing her thoroughly at the same time, and it sends jolts of pleasure through her that leave her trembling. His thumb brushes her clit. She moves with him, her hips swaying into his touch. She is no longer tired but rather entirely awake, her senses expanding and sharpening.

He pulls away and tastes her off his fingers. Watching it makes a small moan escape her.

"Stars Rey, you're so ready."

She reaches down and cups a hand over his erection, squeezing the considerable length of it. He grimaces and bows his head into her chest. "So are you," she responds. 

He growls something incoherent and pulls her hand away, pinning it above her head. He drags his tongue up her neck and then nuzzles at her ear and it nearly undoes her. "I want to undress you," he says against her skin. His voice breaks a little.

She nods and he begins peeling away her layers. He does it slowly, almost reverently, stroking each expanse of skin as he reveals it.

When she is bare before him he looks her up and down, drawing in a sharp breath. "You're beautiful," he whispers.

He pulls off his own clothes, baring his broad muscled chest and shoulders, until only his pants are left. And then he is on her, his mouth and hands moving down her body. He is dragging his lips and tongue over her nipples, her navel, her hipbones. His hands are so big they feel as though they are everywhere at once.

He looks up at her as if for further permission and she grants it. He moves his head down, so that it is framed by her legs, and she tenses, not knowing what to expect. 

He puts his mouth on her and her mind blanks with sensation. His tongue flickers against her, his lips suck at her, his nose and chin nuzzle into her, his breath teases her. She writhes, gasping, and he stops, raising his head to look at her. " Are you alright? Is this alright?"

"Yes," she gasps. "Yes."

He nods and returns to her. He learns quickly what places and speeds and pressures and rhythms make her whimper and squirm. She can feel his response to her response through the bond: his awe and excitement, the way his cock aches with it. For her. He wants to devour her.

It pushes her over the edge. One more touch of his mouth and something hot and incandescent is blazing through her, fire scorching every nerve. She cries out, her body arching off the bed. She hears him too - he must feel it alongside her. 

He kisses her lightly one more time and she jumps, hypersensitive. She pushes him away, still spasming with aftershocks. 

He climbs up until he is beside her. He gives her time to recover, kissing up the column of her neck as she catches her breath.

As she returns to lucidity, she can tell that despite how much he wants her, he is also willing to stop here, to put her pleasure before his own. Not that he didn't share in it through the bond, but still, his self control astounds her, seeing as she seems to have so little right now.

Her body settles, and it's not long before she wants more again. She reaches for him and looking relieved and grateful, he moves back astride her. The feel of his skin against hers, his muscles sliding beneath it, is a kind of bliss. She doesn't know if she's ever felt anything so pure.

He grinds against her and the friction is delicious and tormenting at the same time. "Take off your pants," she says, and he does. 

As he moves toward her again, she panics for a moment. She hasn't been thinking, about precautions. "Wait. I..."

He stills her with a kiss. "It's alright," he says against her mouth. "I have something. Something you can take after, to be safe." She believes him.

She reaches down and takes him in her hand, nestling the tip of him at her entrance. He presses into the slickness of her, and a sound rumbles in his chest, guttural and raw. Their eyes lock together, and his pleasure is her own and hers is his as he slowly sinks into her. 

His pupils are blown wide and there is something akin to wonder on his face. She feels a rush of tenderness and her arousal heightens even further.

He settles against her, giving her a moment to adjust, his body shaking with restraint. Just as it did with his mind, it takes her a few moments to surrender to the feeling of him filling her so completely.

He seems to sense when her body yields and begins to move. It feels like something she's been missing as long as she can remember, returned to her. They fit together perfectly. She moans as his cock sends spiralling shocks of pleasure through the core of her.

Their bodies easily slip into a rhythm with their minds connected, moving in tandem just as they did when fighting in the crimson throne room. It is as natural and instinctive as breathing. Only now, as his thrusts grow deeper and more sure, the power tearing through her like wildfire is of a different kind.

She is burning and burning. She is calling his name again and she's not sure which one, but it doesn't matter, here in this place. She wants all of him: Kylo, Ben, the dark and the light.

No, she can't join him, but perhaps together they can be something new. Now that he's inside her, body and mind, all the old distinctions are blurred. _Let the past die. ___

____

____

The darkness in her swirls up to meet his and it is not the sterile, fanatical darkness of the First Order, but instead the darkness of earth, of seeds in soil, fertile and rich.

At the same time, his light rises to meet hers and together they are bright enough to rival stars. 

_Of course it's all connected. _Luke had taught her as much even if he himself hadn't fully understood.__

____

____

Her legs are wrapped around him. "Don't be gentle," she says, "give it all to me."

He groans. The Force is swirling around them. It lifts her hips as he bends her knees back, positioning her so that he can fuck her deeper.

It goes on and on until she's sure the whole galaxy must feel them somehow, shockwaves of their coupling reverberating through every system. At one point he uses his mind to turn her over onto her belly. He is thrusting into her and one of his hands is curled around her throat, pulling her head back so that his teeth can graze her neck. 

At another he rolls her on top, and she rides along the length of him. He is straining up to kiss her as though he may never get the chance again, he is worshipping her with his hands.

She is underneath him again when the pressure breaks, climax rushing through her in a maelstrom of feeling that explodes through their bond and brings him to his. He is roaring into the crook of her neck, convulsing with his release. She feels him pulsing inside her, or maybe it is her, fluttering around him. 

It lasts forever and she is satiated and boneless beneath him, but it is not enough. She does not want him to withdraw from her and he doesn't. He rests his forehead against hers and they remain like that, catching their breath.

After, when it is truly done, he rolls off her and she curls up against his side, her head on his shoulder, her arm draped across his chest. One of his hands draws absentminded patterns on her arm.

Again, after quite some time has passed, it is he who ends the silence. "Where do we go from here?"

She thinks about all that's happened. "I don't know," she says slowly. "This doesn't mean... "

"I know."

"Do you? Because I can't...I can't be the Light for you Ben." She raises her head up to meet his eyes, imploring him to understand. "You have to find it yourself. You have to find it _in _yourself. I can't save you. You have to save yourself."__

____

____

"I know", he repeats. "I know."

He kisses her forehead with a soft brush of his lips that makes her throat constrict with feeling. "I think I know what I need to do. But first I need to get you off this ship." 

She nods. "Can it wait a little longer?" She asks. She just wants to stay nestled in the warmth of him for a while more. For as long as she can before they must part ways again.

"Yes," he says, and she can feel him smiling, her head tucked under his chin. "We still have a little time."

She sighs in contentment and wriggles closer, burrowing into him and breathing in his scent. It's a quiet kind of victory; one only the two of them know about. But for now, it's enough.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments very welcomed. I own nothing and make no money from this.


End file.
